Reader Maura writes:

You may have addressed this already, but what about those who have a career, are not crazy about it, and have NO idea what they want to do with their lives?  Example: Me. 28 years old. Working for the same company for 5 1/2 years.  Too comfortable.  Love the people I work with, especially my boss.  I don’t love the work, I don’t even like it really.  I’m bored even though there is plenty of work to do.  I’m not motivated and feel like there is something else out there that I could bust my butt for, but just don’t know what it is.

Just wondering if you could blog about this sometime.

Dear Maura,

Oh, wow, that is the biggest topic of all!

And the most important.

You may or may not be comforted to know that your situation is 100%, completely, entirely normal.  Many (most?) people do not know–when they are 28, or 38 (even 48!)–what they want to do in  life.

So you don’t need to feel bad that you don’t know yet.  The only thing to worry about is being in a state where you’re not searching.  A life’s work, true calling, dream job, whatever, doesn’t just fall out of the sky.  We have to hunt it down.  (While hunting, most people make one or more wrong moves.  That’s also part of the deal.)

It may help to think about what a dream job is.  In a nutshell, it’s a job where you are doing things you are good at and that you like doing, in a field that gives you joy.  It’s also good if this work reflects your values, earns you the amount of money you want/need, has the level of responsibility you want/need, and is in an environment you like being in.

Sound like a tall order?  Here’s a small, specific way to start:

1. list the skills you have that you are good at and enjoy doing (e.g., advising, gathering data, teaching, selling, supervising, bringing order out of chaos, writing, drawing)
2. list fields that give you joy (e.g., travel, computers, houses, law, children, languages, nature, health, airplanes, money)
3. list what you like about the job you’ve got now
4. list what you don’t like about the job you’ve got now

You should end up with a lot of data.  Is it pointing in any particular direction?  Say your lists reveal that you love giving advice, are interested in money, are happiest at work when you’re with people, and are unhappiest when stuck by yourself in the background.  Hmmm.  Whadyya think?  Financial adviser?  (Next step: research–e.g., talk with current & former financial advisers, read their blogs, books, magazines, etc.)

Maybe your lists don’t point in any one clear direction.  (Real life is never as simple as the examples you read in advice columns!  Your path will not be like anyone else’s path!) 

So show your lists to others for their reactions.  Talk with a former professor, older friend, former boss.  Get a mentor.  Get ten!  (Click here and here for some thoughts on that.)  Are you a book-oriented person?  Mr. Bolles’s “What Color is Your Parachute?” is still the gold standard for finding your dream job.  Are you a research junkie?  Google “how to identify your true calling” and have at it.

It’s a big project.  It may–um, will–take a while.  Fortunately, it’s hugely fun.

One last thing: Meanwhile, in the job you have now, try to enhance the parts about it you like and minimize the parts you don’t like.  Or start a new hobby that absolutely turns you on (fringe benefit:  hobbies often point the way to new careers).  Or start volunteering.  Or take a class.  Or something!

The key:  Do something. 

This entry was posted on Monday, November 3rd, 2008 at 11:21 am and is filed under ask Working Girl, career advice. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.